Going to the Dentist is Fun! (Really?)

The older son (almost in double digits) has some seriously messed-up teeth. Like, we had our first taste of orthodontia at four years old messed up teeth. So, at nine years old, he's already had one of those expander contraptions and what is called Phase I of braces (basically, an Inspired Scheme to Sucker More Money Out of Us by stretching this out as long as possible). I had braces twenty years ago, but apparently the thinking nowadays (you know, since we're no longer in the Dark Ages) is to put them on when the kids are younger.

Not that this has been a problem for him. When the dentist's office is essentially a video arcade / television fun time with a brief intermission for someone to mess with your mouth, what's not to like?

However, all of this means my nine-year-old son has a retainer. Now, if you have never been to the Land of the Nine-Year-Old Boy, you have no idea of the level of crazy thinking and unexplainable behavior it contains. Just for example, this boy can't get the thought out of his head that mom is responsible for this appliance that spends most of its lifespan in his mouth. Hmmm, really? So, the result of our residence in this land is that he has lost one set of retainers and then broken the replacement, all in less than six months' time. The six-eight permanent teeth he has in his mouth are lovely and straight and all, but dude, I'm not sure this is really worth it. Keeping up with his backpack is about as much responsibility as this kid can handle, really. And some days he doesn't even do that too well.

So, the long and the short of this situation is my need to decide where we're going from here. Do we replace the retainer yet again? Do we accept that the six-eight permanent teeth might become less straight before Phase II of the bloodletting, a.k.a. paying for more braces, begins, and just ditch the retainer? Because mom is really over all this, let me tell you. Especially when I talked with the orthodontist about this yesterday, and her response was to remind me that it is really likely that, even with the retainer, his teeth won't remain straight and lovely as more permanent teeth begin coming in. Really? So Phase I of the blood, sweat and tears (and money - we're a one-income household, people) was for what, then?

In other news, second son is six, and those first permanent teeth in the front aren't looking too good. Maybe we should put him to work now.